It reminds me of a term people use in support communities for folks with estranged/difficult parents like r/JUSTNOMIL and r/raisedbynarcissists - "Missing Missing Reasons"
This article digs into it in depth: http://www.issendai.com/psychology/estrangement/missing-missing-reasons.html
Essentially the idea is that these abusive parents will hold 2 beliefs simultaneously: That their kids hold on to a laundry list of petty grievances that they'll fling in their parents' faces in long diatribes, pages-long letters, rants, etc...while they also will argue that they have no idea why their child has limited contact, and how blindsided they are by everything and if they don't even know what they DID how can they RESPOND or MOVE FORWARD????
Re: "I don't know what's been said about me!"
This article digs into it in depth: http://www.issendai.com/psychology/estrangement/missing-missing-reasons.html
Essentially the idea is that these abusive parents will hold 2 beliefs simultaneously: That their kids hold on to a laundry list of petty grievances that they'll fling in their parents' faces in long diatribes, pages-long letters, rants, etc...while they also will argue that they have no idea why their child has limited contact, and how blindsided they are by everything and if they don't even know what they DID how can they RESPOND or MOVE FORWARD????