tf_talk | Gloves Off

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Gloves Off

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I don't get the flip-flopping between the "I am a pretty bishi boy" and "I am a grizzled MAN who's HARDCORE and TOUGH." I get that there's probably some dysphoria-related anxiety wrapped up in there somewhere, but like, pick one, dude. TBH he can't pull off either convincingly anymore, but it's a way harder sell to try to pull off both at the same time.

I was just thinking this the other day. It's going to be interesting to see how he handles aging, as a narc. Because I'm sure we'll still be seeing him popping up on the internet, in fandom in another 15 years or so - what else is he going to do since he's hitched his wagon to costume design and the peripheries of the entertainment industry. I expect he'll be e-begging for plastic surgery.

I don't think it's dysphoria or narcissism to want both, tbh. I mean, I oscillate between wanting to be an ethereal fairy princess waif, and wanting to basically be Tank Girl.

I think the weird part is him trying to convince others that he is both via very bad photoshop. (Seriously, look at the weird shape he gave his pupils). It's normal to have multiple facets of your personality, to play around with your appearance and wear different styles, and for your mood to vary. It's another thing entirely to photoshop yourself and complain about how hard life is because you totes look like that for real, guiz.

The post was public and I went and found it, and someone made a disgusting comment about how his big bishounen eyes are how he managed to scam and hurt so many people, because some people have a weakness for big animu eyes. That's right: it's not Andy's doing, it's that he is just 2 kawaii 2 control. Inviting that kind of response is way more disgusting and sick to me than just wanting to be an anime boy.

AYRT

I wondered if it was dysphoria in the sense that like, okay, if you're a dude who looked extremely feminine for a good chunk of your life and that makes you feel less manly and good about yourself, your coping mechanism might be to play up your masculinity as a counterbalance, or, on the flip side, you might lean into and embrace the feminine/androgynous aspects of yourself as a sort of deliberate fuck-you to your own insecurity.

What doesn't make sense, to me, is simultaneously trying to be both, not acknowledging them as presentations, and not acknowledging nuance or grey areas of gender expression.

Like, it's not, "I am a man who varies my gender presentation," or even, "I am a man who has some traditionally feminine interests." It's, "I am a masculine manly dude, how dare you accuse me of being gay! Liking feminine things isn't gay! But also please acknowledge how transgressive my liking feminine things is! Notice how feminine I am to the point of being androgynous! But also NEVER acknowledge it, I'm EXTREMELY masculine!"

Like, it's not just the flip-flopping, I think. It's acting like the two presentations are diametrically opposed and never the twain shall meet, and then not acknowledging that this is a huge self-contradiction. (And now that line from Whitman about containing multitudes is stuck in my head.)

DA. I've been thinking hard about this and while I agree, it's normal and harmless to have multiple facets to our identity/persona, I think there's something that bothers me about Andy's dichotomy.
As usual, he's creating a narrative and trying to control it.

He presents as the manly man (who took a claymore to the chest in a barfight!) and people think they know where they stand with that sort of character but - woah! - he's also a sensitive dude into female-oriented fandoms. How crazy! doesn't he just blow your mind?

Also, working the other way, this bishie manic pixie dream boy has all these survivalist skills and war stories. Ha! Where are your stereotypes now?!

Normal people have different facets but just honestly present themselves to the world, he seems to be playing (a very stilted) role. As anon says, there's no nuance or gray areas. He lives like he writes - no depth; all cliché.

It might be clunky, but it's manipulative - if he can reel someone into his wacky personal narrative, he can start to control things.

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