For all your Andy-related info-dumping needs. If there's information you'd like to archive, please post it here, and feel free to link to it from the main post if you'd like to discuss it.
For those of you who have been on this LJ for any length of time, it is no secret that I have a very serious heart defect. Part of the valve on my aorta did not form properly, and every time my heart beats, it bulges like a weak spot on an old tire – sort of a cardiac hernia, you might say. One of these days, it is going to go boom, that’s all there is to it, because my only other options due to the precise placement of it would be a full or partial transplant, which for numerous personal reasons, I have decided against.
I actually wasn’t expected to live to adulthood, as they didn’t think my heart would be able to handle the growth, and in an odd way, I didn’t. I stopped growing at about fifteen – xrays show that the growth plates in my wrists still aren’t even closed – as if my body knew its limits and was trying to preserve itself. That taken into account, I’ve previously been given a life expectancy of somewhere between two and five years from now.
However, I’ve been having some trouble recently for the first time in my life. Loss of energy, occasional lightheadedness when I exert myself particularly, fingers and hands swelling (I was using my own hand for a reference and realized I’d lost most of the definition on the back of it) as well as some pretty nasty pain and swelling in my legs and feet when I am on them for more than a few hours, trouble with my hands being cold. Nothing debilitating or even more than annoying, but it seemed potentially circulatory, and Than’s no fool.
So I went to the cardiologist this morning (he helps me pro bono because of something I did for his daughter when she was in a bad situation), and wound up doing only a half day of work because of the number of tests he wanted to run. It’s thinning faster than he had anticipated…looks like I’ve got a little less than a year, after all.
THERE IS NO NEED TO TRY AND GIVE ME ANY EMOTIONAL SUPPORT ON THIS, REALLY!
I am FINE. I have known I’m on the short and glorious route for years, and this has never been something that upset me, though I am not in any form of denial and never have been. See dozens of previous posts, mostly of the meme variety, as well as my Faith essay for the long version of this. I am posting this not as some kind of OMGI’mDYING thing, but to let the flist know, because I know a lot of you care about this sort of thing, and I want to give you time to prepare, even though I’ve warned you before and even though I know that several of you to whom I’m closest have flat out told me verbatim that you refuse to accept that I’m terminal.
Honestly, I’m kind of awestruck at how perfectly this has all worked out. Really, it couldn’t be better. Louise and Connor are settled in by now to wherever they are with whomever they are, so they don’t have to deal with losing me like that, nor do I have to worry I’ll ‘blow’ in front of my son. I don’t have a car right now, so when I’m in real danger of popping, I’ll not have to worry about taking out others, I don’t have the kind of job where anything will be ruined by my absence, and I’ll have just about exactly enough time to finish both the DAYDverse and my current people-projects (someone crossing the line to adulthood, someone coping with loss, someone finding faith, and a few others) without having enough time to get embroiled in something I’d leave half-done or being tempted to start another major life phase or project. Looking back, I genuinely can’t say there could have been a better time for this, and the amount of notice I have is exactly right to make sure loose ends are tied up without rushing or dallying.
It’s so beautiful the way that everything falls together when you just do your own little part, isn’t it? I can’t even imagine a reason to be upset by this, and every reason to be grateful.
Andy's bucket list, since he's only "got a year" left
Longer post about my trip coming after work. Short version: It was GREAT.
It has also given me an idea that combines three things on my "so, I've got a year, huh?" list: 1. Meet as many flisters as possible 2. Get in some more traveling 3. Help as many people as possible.
Longer later, but the upshot is this...I will post 2-3 weeks in advance every time I have a 60-hour consecutive stretch or longer off of work. If you want me to come visit you in that time, you just have to get me there, and I don't care how. Train, plane, bus, automobile, floo, rickshaw, camel, whatever. Don't eat much, am not picky, and will sleep anywhere.
Get me there, and for roughly two days, Than is yours...to chat, cook, bake, clean, watch your kids, help them with homework, beta your fic, write fic for you, draw for you, make you a costume, paint a mural in your house, do your yardwork, give you a back rub...anything non-sexual you can think of wanting from a handsome, intelligent, and multi-talented young man, really. I'd love to be able to offer to just go on my own, but there are a very limited number of times I can afford that, and I'm afraid I have to be very judicious with those. If you'll get me there, however, I am SO eagerly yours, and just ask ceirdwenfc...I REALLY mean it when I say I'll show up!
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Andy declares he's dying & is glad his son (a sparrow) won't be there to see
(Anonymous) 2015-04-18 05:10 am (UTC)(link)For those of you who have been on this LJ for any length of time, it is no secret that I have a very serious heart defect. Part of the valve on my aorta did not form properly, and every time my heart beats, it bulges like a weak spot on an old tire – sort of a cardiac hernia, you might say. One of these days, it is going to go boom, that’s all there is to it, because my only other options due to the precise placement of it would be a full or partial transplant, which for numerous personal reasons, I have decided against.
I actually wasn’t expected to live to adulthood, as they didn’t think my heart would be able to handle the growth, and in an odd way, I didn’t. I stopped growing at about fifteen – xrays show that the growth plates in my wrists still aren’t even closed – as if my body knew its limits and was trying to preserve itself. That taken into account, I’ve previously been given a life expectancy of somewhere between two and five years from now.
However, I’ve been having some trouble recently for the first time in my life. Loss of energy, occasional lightheadedness when I exert myself particularly, fingers and hands swelling (I was using my own hand for a reference and realized I’d lost most of the definition on the back of it) as well as some pretty nasty pain and swelling in my legs and feet when I am on them for more than a few hours, trouble with my hands being cold. Nothing debilitating or even more than annoying, but it seemed potentially circulatory, and Than’s no fool.
So I went to the cardiologist this morning (he helps me pro bono because of something I did for his daughter when she was in a bad situation), and wound up doing only a half day of work because of the number of tests he wanted to run. It’s thinning faster than he had anticipated…looks like I’ve got a little less than a year, after all.
THERE IS NO NEED TO TRY AND GIVE ME ANY EMOTIONAL SUPPORT ON THIS, REALLY!
I am FINE. I have known I’m on the short and glorious route for years, and this has never been something that upset me, though I am not in any form of denial and never have been. See dozens of previous posts, mostly of the meme variety, as well as my Faith essay for the long version of this. I am posting this not as some kind of OMGI’mDYING thing, but to let the flist know, because I know a lot of you care about this sort of thing, and I want to give you time to prepare, even though I’ve warned you before and even though I know that several of you to whom I’m closest have flat out told me verbatim that you refuse to accept that I’m terminal.
Honestly, I’m kind of awestruck at how perfectly this has all worked out. Really, it couldn’t be better. Louise and Connor are settled in by now to wherever they are with whomever they are, so they don’t have to deal with losing me like that, nor do I have to worry I’ll ‘blow’ in front of my son. I don’t have a car right now, so when I’m in real danger of popping, I’ll not have to worry about taking out others, I don’t have the kind of job where anything will be ruined by my absence, and I’ll have just about exactly enough time to finish both the DAYDverse and my current people-projects (someone crossing the line to adulthood, someone coping with loss, someone finding faith, and a few others) without having enough time to get embroiled in something I’d leave half-done or being tempted to start another major life phase or project. Looking back, I genuinely can’t say there could have been a better time for this, and the amount of notice I have is exactly right to make sure loose ends are tied up without rushing or dallying.
It’s so beautiful the way that everything falls together when you just do your own little part, isn’t it? I can’t even imagine a reason to be upset by this, and every reason to be grateful.
Andy's bucket list, since he's only "got a year" left
(Anonymous) 2015-04-18 05:12 am (UTC)(link)Longer post about my trip coming after work. Short version: It was GREAT.
It has also given me an idea that combines three things on my "so, I've got a year, huh?" list:
1. Meet as many flisters as possible
2. Get in some more traveling
3. Help as many people as possible.
Longer later, but the upshot is this...I will post 2-3 weeks in advance every time I have a 60-hour consecutive stretch or longer off of work. If you want me to come visit you in that time, you just have to get me there, and I don't care how. Train, plane, bus, automobile, floo, rickshaw, camel, whatever. Don't eat much, am not picky, and will sleep anywhere.
Get me there, and for roughly two days, Than is yours...to chat, cook, bake, clean, watch your kids, help them with homework, beta your fic, write fic for you, draw for you, make you a costume, paint a mural in your house, do your yardwork, give you a back rub...anything non-sexual you can think of wanting from a handsome, intelligent, and multi-talented young man, really. I'd love to be able to offer to just go on my own, but there are a very limited number of times I can afford that, and I'm afraid I have to be very judicious with those. If you'll get me there, however, I am SO eagerly yours, and just ask ceirdwenfc...I REALLY mean it when I say I'll show up!