The difference is that Abbey is here to tell her story and Brittany is not. Discussion of Brittany is not off-limits by any means, but we need to draw a line somewhere and too much speculation feels invasive when Brittany isn't able to say anything at all.

That said, situations like this cropping up is why we need at least one other mod here. I'm not arrogant enough to believe that I can mod a community like this with only my own opinions to guide me.